cause and effect... wad if... i always believe that everything we do now, no matter how big it is, like setting off a bomb, or how insignificant it is, like brushing ur teeth, will have an impact on how de future is shaped... human mind often works in de way where we tink abt de "wad if"s.. wad if i haf slapped that guy whom i dislike? wad if i propose to my girlfriend? wad if i have not stabbed him?

but this is juz wad's valuable abt life.. we haf no time machine.. we cant rewind to de past and change de past, neither can we fast forward to de future to see wad's de implications of our actions today...

certainly, my life today would haf been different, if that thing of several months ago happen... i shld haf left this place where i've lived for 18 yrs... i shld be living quite a budget lifestyle now... i may not haf a computer now... i shld be/may be...........................

perhaps i've been too persistent that my decision then shld be taken up... perhaps on de other hand, becoz of one woman's decision that goes against mine, de children are protected in a way.. to be still in a 'full' family, to still enjoy stuff like familiar surroundings, computer, tv...

i'm tired of all these...

but i'm still glad i still got my frens out there... these 2 days haf been largely fun... ytd met kang and ben coincidentally and den went for dinner... today's soccer game was fun too (mayb coz i get to play longer =X )

anyway i shall get going... it's back to camp... and it's ICCT this whole wk... duno wad to expect from de tosses and locks =S