been a real long time since i last updated... been rather busy these past 2 wks, coz the others all POP and come out of tekong liao, so there are more ppl available for various programmes... been either going out to 'swim', or staying at home dota-ing for several hrs, or going out for movies.. (watched 3 movies past 2 wks) not forgetting the 4one gathering i had last thurs... been such a long long time since i last saw most of them, around 2 yrs actually... almost everyone has changed a lot, leading different lives now... am rather thankful to aizat, jieying n juliana for making de effort 2 organise this gathering, since the class chairman was useless to organise anything... lolol... for those who duno, the chairman i'm referring to is myself... all of a sudden missed the secondary sch days... missed the carefree days when we were crappy, having fun and bearing no concern for the sch rules... but time does fly by, and we are almost 20 now... sangita mentioned that day abt having a gathering 20 yrs on, which means we would be 39 yrs old by den, almost 40! mid-life crisis! lolol...

also, i haf been busy watching jap drama on de net... actually only drama which takuya kimura acts in.. finished watching 'engine', coz i figured that i wont be able to watch a couple of episodes while in tekong, so might as well finish watching them now... after that i watched 'hero', another show of his.. in this show his character is a public prosecutor, but he's unlike the common kind of public prosecutors who wear suits and are real serious... his attire is casual and he likes to joke around, but he has his own methods of working, which is to conduct lots of investigation, whereby his other colleagues juz like to leave the investigation works to the police... his reason for becoming a public prosecutor is becoz a public prosecutor can protect de victims, especially those who are dead... and one real funny part is that kimura's character is also a hardcore tv shopper, which means he has an addiction to buy anything advertised on the tv shopping channel, and he always ask for the goods to be delivered to the office, so it's real funny to see him try out those stuff he buy thru the tv channel, which include eye massager, workout stuff, knives set and so on... ep 1 shows him trying out some machine to train ur hip and the scene is real hilarious, cant stop laughing after seeing that.. lolol...

as i haf completed watching 'hero' ytd, i was caught in a dilemma of whether to continue watching another show of his... i was deciding between 'long vacation', a rather old show which i havent seen b4, or 'good luck', a show which i haf watched on channel U some yrs back... in de end i decided on 'good luck' coz it was a good show, and i haf forgotten some parts abt it, and i havent watch it b4 in jap language...

during the last 2 wks, i also made a decision abt whether to take up a scholarship, which i decided not to take it up... well i oso duno how to explain the reason for this decision.. to protect myself and say nice things, i can say that becoz i noe i dun haf the real desire to get a scholarship, so i feel i shld not waste the time n effort of the selection panel to look at an application of a person who doesnt wan it that much... of coz i noe very well myself that may not be de real reason... to put it de bad way, it may be simply becoz i'm juz plain lazy, lazy to go back sch n do the necessary procedures and lazy to go for interview... sometimes i juz hate myself...

on the day i made de decision abt de scholarship, i went back to CMPB (central manpower base) for the 3rd time!!! when most ppl only go once... 1st time i went is for the medical checkup for NS, 2nd time is becoz i haf terrible eyesight, this 3rd time is becoz it seems like they lost my blood sample which they got the first time i went and so they cant get info on my blood grp, so i haf to go back to let them take a blood sample again.. so in de end i spent 10 min at there, when i took around one n a half hrs to travel to n back from there... (coz CMPB in redhill) sian half man...

speaking of terrible eyesight, i went ytd to make new glasses for NS, coz we need make glasses wif black plastic frames.. as usual, my eyesight becomes more n more terrible, and my degrees are still rocketing... as of now my degrees are like this... left eye 1100, right eye 1125, i tink... i dun like to go n make new specs, coz de situation would be that my eyesight has become worse by a lot n my new specs will cost a bomb.. my new specs cost 250 bucks btw... this, i feel, is an unnecessary burden... that's y i dun like to go make new glasses.. for now i juz hope that my glasses dun spoil for any reason n therefore i dun hafta go make new ones...

today is sunday.. last day of the wk... and wad an eventful week it had been... by 'eventful' i really mean EVENTFUL.. lolol..

n becoz i gonna recap wad happened throughout the wk, it definitely gonna be a long long entry, so if u got no time, read it another time, or u can read halfway n continue next time..

to start off is a qn... haf you ever walked out of home b4? well i did, n at that point of time when i walked out, i tot i wont return to this hse permanently again.. but den again, my thoughts were wrong and here i m, at my home currently for the time being... i shall explain as i go along..

it started wif a woman, who felt that she cant tolerate of her husband's unreasonable thinkings and actions le... n so one day, after years of frustrations and anger, she decided that if they were to quarrel again, she would pack n leave... n on a particular day this wk, they quarrelled again, n so they quarrelled n quarrelled, and de woman was thinking of leaving... n so she said she wanna leave.. n so de husband came to tell the whole situation to the elder son, who was off from work that day... the son has remained a coward for his past 18 years, he feels, and so he decided that this year he would gif his stand... after pretending to listen to all the crap said by his father (seriously the son feels that he was wasting time, coz wad the father had to say can be finished in 15 min time, but he took 1 hr to nag n nag, which is very typical as de son knew), de son simply said, 'ok, i tink i shld change clothes le'.. ie the son is implying he wanna pack n leave liao...

when the mother n son were at the door, leaving, the mother mentioned sth abt terms n conditions... not terms n conditions on the situation after she n the husband divorce, but terms n conditions which the couple has to obey so as not to let the separation occurs... (my vocab a bit lousy, duno u understand anot).. anyway, the husband n wife suddenly decided that they may not wan the separation n wanna negotiate abt rules they haf to follow to live together... but the elder son cut in, and said 'i see no point in negotiation, we leave'... n so the mother n son left, all de way to de woman's sister's hse in cck, the west..

soon after, the woman's another sister came too and the 2 sisters slowly learnt abt the situation going on... that nite, the man came to negotiate, n the 2 sons juz remained silent for de majority of the session... initially, de man gave the reason "i juz wanna come to tell the others abt the situation n my side of the story".. after he had finished, he refused to leave, becoz his reason for going had changed.. it became "i want to negotiate the terms n conditions for us to live together in the future... i will not leave unless everything is negotiated" n so, his side of de story could be finished in 30 min time, n in total he took 3 plus hrs b4 he finally left, n wad happened in the 3 hrs was rather 'exciting'...

this family is very special, especially the couple and their relationship... many new things, unheard of were brought up... between the couple, there was actually a penalty thing going on... both are not allowed to bring up old stuff that have no connections wif the thing they are quarrelling abt at any time.. to simplify for explanation, event A involves money and happened in the past.. event B involves money n happened now.. event C involves food and happened in the past... if the two are quarrelling abt B, both sides can bring up event A, but cannot bring up event C, or else the person who brings up C will be fined $100... cool hor, easy earning sia.. n guess wad? it's always the man who decides if the event in the past has any connections to the event now... n so he gains big time... it's said he has earned this fine 3 times le, ie a cool 300 bucks..

n so that nite he came and he came wif a new ruling... the person who starts a quarrel will be fined $500... (wah, even easier cash...) of coz the wife doesnt accept.. this is for a very very simple reason.. the man can always say it's de wife who starts the quarrel, when 99.9% of the time it's him who raises his voice first... n so he earns lor, $500 each time... n if the wife decides to keep quiet, he has 2 options.. one is that he keep provocating lor, until the wife snaps, n $$$ for him.. 2nd option is that he says she like mute like that, so that frustrates him, 'causing' him to start the quarrel, so it's de wife that's in the wrong, n again, $$$ for him...

de wife doesnt accept this new rule, n the man doesnt back down, n so it drags for the whole 3 hrs.. de wife's sisters were desperate to keep this marriage, n so they keep being mediators and pushed for both sides to gif in.. finally someone snaps, but it's not the woman, nor the man.. it's de coward elder son... he tried to explain to the woman's sisters that there's no way the 3 of them (mother n 2 sons) can return, coz the mother has danger for her life... explanation is that the man did use violence b4, where he hit the woman and a police report was filed a couple of years back... n so, the elder son decided that there's no guarantee the man wont resort to violence again, n worse still he may kill her in rashness and anger... to add on, the elder son is entering army soon n the younger son has school, so most of de time it's only de couple alone in the house... however, the sisters of the woman juz dun take this seriously..

n so the elder son confronted the man, ie his father... it's the longest conversation between the two of them for the 19 years since the son was born, and..... it was a quarrel... soon heat was rising and it was really a heated argument.. de classic exchange of words were as followed:

Son: there's no guarantee that u wont harm her
Father: den wad u want? i can burn 3 joss sticks and pray to the god i wont hurt her
Son: as if that will prove anything?
Father: ok lor, if i hurt her i gif u a knife, and let u kill me, can?!
Son: pls lor, i not so stupid.. kill u i oso get hanged leh
Father: okok, my wrong.. den i dun let u kill, i ownself go up 12th floor jump down
Son: and den? will that restore everything? bring back de life of de dead?

heated it was, and the son was making provocative actions as de argument went along (he thinks it's provocative la) all for his plan.. he wants the father to hit him... becoz if that happens, the others there will believe that this man isn't safe and so the separation is almost settled.. however the son is no L or Light (characters of death note).. his plan is not foolproof, n de plan failed.. no violence occurred.. n soon one of the woman's sister's husband stepped in and said it's late and everyone needs a cooling down period n so finally managed to persuade the man to leave..

de next day, the woman went to look at a hse she was intending to rent b4 the separation is completed... plans were made for the future but all these were all wasted at nite... the man came up wif a new rule, which is that if a quarrel happens, and one side says 'stop the quarrel' but the other doesnt stop, he/she will be fined... sounds reasonable, and so the sister of the woman keeps persuading the 3 to go home, to gif the man last chance... seriously, the 2 sons haf totally no intentions to go back, but they are seen as kids only and they know their comments are insignificant totally n so they juz say 'no comment' or 'anything'... n so they went home... and found that their house line has been cut by the man, which i tink becoz in normal life the house phone is seldom used by him, and so de calls to the house are not likely to be for him, and so he cut to prevent annoying phone calls... as a result oso, the internet became down too due to de cutting of the phone line...

n so after all these, the elder son has decided that he decides to not care anymore... he once told himself not to care anymore coz it's juz a cycle... war den peace den war again... it's never-ending, and he caring n worrying abt the war in de family was juz a waste of efforts coz it's juz a cycle... when there's de possibility of the separation, the elder son decides that he shld gif his stand after years of silence, which he feels is an act of cowardice... but wad's de results? further deterioration of the relationship between him n his father, when it was already rather bad in the first place le, coz de two of them dun speak for more than 5 sentences each month... now de son feels that the quarrel that happened in the week wont be de last time they clash... oso, although the 2 sons continue to remain determined to support the separation, their feelings and thoughts are not considered as the adults juz haf their own discussions and make their own decisions... they juz dun accept ur thinkings which they feel is not gd and juz use their decision, and so de elder son realises all these now, and decides not to care anymore, as he's insignificant anyway...

moving on to fri, de day of release of A Level results... wasnt really nervous up till this day as i didnt haf much time to tink abt it anyway.. (due to the walking out of home and hectic work) got more n more nervous when i was in the hall listening to de principal talk... when i finally got the result, i was quite surprised at my results, den was rather happy abt it... n den de rest of de day wasnt really interesting liao...

saturday went guanlong's hse to meet the others whom i have not met for ages, since they went tekong or police academy... was rather interesting to see their botak heads... lolol... played mahjong until 8 plus when we stopped and stayed to watch the game between man utd and liverpool... overall the game was rather boring, n man utd got lucky for 2nd wk running wif an injury time winner by o'shea, when scholes was sent off like 4 min earlier... guess man utd shld be winning the epl title le ba... in a league, the champion needs consistency and luck in the season, and man utd showed they have both this season, so it's likely they shld win de title le, unless sth serious happens to them... during the 2nd half, we half watched the game half played blackjack... blackjack the wins and losses were much much faster than mahjong, and i tink for the 45 min we played blackjack, i tink i lost abt the same or more than wad i lost for mahjong which i played for abt 3 plus hrs... lolol..

2 years plus back, i chose JC coz i didnt noe which sub i wanna choose if i go poly, coz de subjects are too specialised... 2 years plus juz passed like this and now i hafta finally make the decision on which specialised sub i wanna take in uni.. really a big headache for me coz i haf totally no idea on wad subs there are, which uni is better, wad subs haf wad future career prospects, which subs i haf interest in etc etc... (actually i feel i got no interest in anything.. lolol...) and so, to say the truth, i quite envy those who haf sth in mind le, be it a firm decision on a particular course, having shortlised a couple of subjects or scholarships etc etc... at least their scope is narrowed, and they know wad they want, regardless whether they go NUS, NTU, SMU or poly... for me, i still in a loss... very confused and duno wad to do... haizzzzz....

anyway, it has been a long long long long entry... lucky from tml onwards this wk will be working afternoon shift throughout... so i can wake up late for this coming wk... btw, every fri nite there's a new jap show called 'engine', featuring Takuya Kimura 木村拓哉 ( mu chun) a pity is that it's a rather late show, 11.30 pm to 12.30am, and de worse thing is it's only shown once a wk =/ de 1st episode was quite gd, and i expect the show to be a gd one... guess i shall stop here for now..

PS: for those whom the elder son lied to, regardless whether it's abt why he cant access internet, or why cannot call his home number that time to contact him, well, he can only say sorry, becoz it will be too long a story if he says de truth, and this truth isn't really that easy to say oso...

Final note: for various reasons u may come to know abt this blog.. but i would like this blog to remain very low profile, thus i ask for no publicity for this blog.. thanx!