today... last day of feb... day of de release of O's results... tears, screams, shouts, laughter.... all these were all found in de hall 2day... on this particular day of my life 2day, de picture of life was shown very clearly... some ppl were happy, some sad, some disappointed, some satisfied, some couldn't believe their good scores, some juz dun really care...... oso, not 2 forget, many thoughts are about wad shld they choose for post-secondary... jc or poly? shld stay in current jc, or move 2 another one? all these decisions all came at one go, and we are juz stunned by it... some ppl may haf planned everything already, like where 2 go for wad range of scores, but i guess for most, de thinking part starts now... crossroads ahead, which paths 2 choose? which is de best way for u?

oso, amanda power sia... from prelim L1R5 of 22 to now of 9... super power sia... congrats to her! to think that she was still all nervous b4 going into de sch... got 9 for me, maintained de standard from prelims, so not bad... got A2 for combined humanities... damn surprised lor... to think that my history sux big time... once got 1/13 for essay b4 lor... den higher chinese get C6, dunno go jc need take CLAO anot... some say in aj those who get below B4 need take... sian liao lor.... now got 4 subjects so taxing le, add one more will die sia... plus my chinese is getting worse each year sia.... a lot of thinking to do lah... dunno where 2 go... decisons and more decisions... i guess all part and parcel of life ba...

now is the carling cup final between liverpool n chelsea... and liverpool is leading by 1-0, thanks to riise, who scored within 1 min... and after that goal, chelsea has been dominating de whole game, but still cannot find de equalising goal... i guess de eventual winner shld be liverpool ba, coz chelsea really lacks de firepower when robben is not around... well, i guess that's another trophy gone... 2 say de truth, all of chelsea's available trophies now look very difficult to attain... now trailing in carling cup final, trailing behind barcelona after first leg game of champions league, and now de lead at the top of the premiership table is becoming shorter... haizzz....

anyway, watched a short video clip, given 2 me by chee wei.... it's about how de ppl 'get' animal furs off de animals, so that they can sell these furs.... it's a gross video, and a phrase that really caught my attention was 'is one's happiness built on others' misery and pain?' in this case, it refers to happiness of those who got those animal furs they wan, and de misery and pain of the animals... de most cruel part of this whole fur trade thingy is that the animals are all still in consciousness when the ppl literally peel their furs off them... there are 3 cases of 3 types of animals in de whole clip, first is the raccoon, or sth like that (i'm not really sure coz all the words in de clip are chinese)... firstly the man whacked the racoons on de ground, attempting 2 knock them out, den he cut their legs out, and began peeling... after all the tugging and pulling, the man got de fur he wan, and threw the all bloody raccoon to one side, wif the other 'peeled' raccoons... de most saddening thing that is shown is that it's clearly seen that the raccoons are still alive, and conscious throughout and after the 'peeling process'... their eyes clearly showed the pain which they will never understand, because it was never part of nature.... next is fox, when the man was going 2 do the 'peeling process' again, de fox struggles, and so 2 kill it, de man kept stepping on its head, using his whole body weight 2 crush the fox's skull... but because de fox is not killed, de man kept repeating that stepping process, which is damn cruel... den it was so gross that i dun wanna continue watching le, so i didn't continue 2 watch abt the third kind of animal...

wad i really dun understand is y ppl wan animal furs for??? de ppl killing de animals are at fault, but they won't be doing it if nobody wans de furs, so y wan furs?? it's not like the furs are some heavenly treasures like that... okok, it's not like i'm some sort of environmentalist or zoologist or wadever, but i really hope that this kind of fur trade, and similar trade, eg killing rhinos for their horns and elephants for their tusks, muz really stop... they oso haf lives, i dun really tink u will like someone 2 skin u alive, juz to use that very skin of urs becoz of some fashion thingy...

ok, chelsea had equalised, thru stevie gerrard's own goal... oso, mourinho is sent off for making an unacceptable celebration... -_-" manager still like that.. sometimes muz control mah... so it's going to go into extra time le... means it will be a later sleep time for me liao... around 13 more hrs to taking back O's results le... but before that, carling cup will be more important for me...

yesterday wanted 2 update, but went for afternoon nap at 4 plus n unfortunately de nap became a sleep, and i only woke up at 8am this morning... this whole week was all de 'o level' atmosphere... although it was thought that this fri, which was yesterday, would be de release date, coz it fitted nicely into de conditions, which are 'it usually is on a fri' and 'it will be in late feb'... however, it was not on fri, but on monday... so next week whole week holidays! not bad, can haf a break from sch life... after next week got a week of lessons again, but de following week is holidays again! so will be looking forward to it... while everyone's getting excited about de O's, i was more excited of the champions league week, which was this week... for de 1st time ever, i watched 2 soccer games, early in de morning, for 2 consecutive mornings, wed and thurs... okok, chelsea lost to barcelona... no need 2 'suan' me le... de sending off of drogba was de catalyst... wif 10 men, chelsea began 2 defend like siao, n barcelona kept attacking, like firing squad like that... barca players stood outside chelsea's penalty box, n once they got de ball they tried 2 shoot whenever there's chance... but barca's second goal, scored by etoo, was very nicely and cleverly done... he creeped behind 2 defenders and dashed past between them to apply de touch to the incoming ball to score... anyway, dun say about champions league le... our physics teacher, christopher liu had gone back to australia yesterday... he still got his studies there mah... so we got new teacher, ong guan hong... a little background, he was an ex-AJCian, from 11/01, was a top student in 2002, got 7 distinctions (i tink), from RI, 7 distinctions include 4 A level subjects, 2 s-paper, and 1 for CLAO (and he oso said that he took CLAO to get that one more distinction, not becoz he needed to take), juz out from NS, will be taking medicine course when he goes to uni... that's about it... oso, he dun hold much authority in my class, yesterday he wanted to go thru de tutorial, but de class insisted on him introducing himself, and insisted on his views about aj, and wadever crap, and soon de lesson was over... w/o going thru de tutorial, and de whole lesson about himself.... but sending a person, who's going to take medicine course in uni, to teach physics is very weird... oso, aj's principal, mr tan, did his propaganda on thurs... all de j1s went to the auditorium to hear his 'speech'... he talked about de decisions we r going 2 make, which is which jc to choose for JAE... he said we shld tink wisely coz top 5 is not a good choice for those who are hardworking coz they will lose out 2 de other smarter students there, coz the others can pick up things easier, so de teachers won't teach much... den he said those who are introverted and take long time 2 adapt shld stay coz they haf frens in aj already... finally, he oso said that for those who r competitive, wan 2 challenge against those from de top sec sch, at the top JCs, den go ahead...

a qn to ponder about... if someone knows a lot of other ppl's secrets, and he/she tells another person one of the secrets, is he/she trustable? most will tink, hmmmm, no, he/she is not... but if it's said so, den is a person who keeps everything from others considered trustable? and so, antarctica had their once-in-a-while debate again, this morning... some feel that it depends on de level of secrecy of de secret, some believe that no secrets can be kept, while some feel that shld at least respect the trust the person has in u, if he/she tells u his/her secret... anyway, sth 2 ponder about....

anyway, if u, who's reading this now, are getting ur O's result on monday, den all the best to u~~

yesterday was aj family day, cum funfair... de opening ceremony was crap... after national anthem and sch song, it was to be mass dance time... so the j2s formed a rectangle on de perimeter on the field, while the j1s formed a line around the perimeter of the track... and so, de song started, and no one moved... lol... ok lah, those who wanna danced ran to de centre of the field to form another circle to dance.. after de song ended, de councillor at the mike there den said, 'that was the trial run, now for the real thing, ppl let's dance!' and de song started again, and no one moved again... i guess she shld haf said, 'those who wanna dance can go to join de circle at the centre of the field'... well, anyway, after all that, went to de benches outside LT1 to watch kang and qy play chess... den me and gl went to netball/basketball court there watched soccer between the teachers and students... den watched many games... den saw the 'power' of many aj soccer team players... one is kim, who did tricks like the tricks are part of his running, smoothly and neatly done... de other is zhong, de cap, who did a rainbow, unexpectedly... den after watching de games, went back stall see see lor... den helped out a bit lor, helped arrange de cans and pick up de balls lor... drank 4 and a half cans of root beer yesterday, becoz in need of cans mah... in the end stomach full of gas... den went to outside LT1 again, this time watched gl and qy played chess... den soon de family day ended liao, den gl went home, kang and qy went pool, me went mac wait for my mother, coz going see doc for my hand yesterday mah... funny sia, she told me 2 wait outside mac there for her, den when i reached still early, so went jubilee de popular see see books and cds lor, den received call from mother, say she reached le, den i walked back to outside mac, but dun see her... den received her call again, and she said she at jubilee there... =/ dumb sia, needed 2 walk back to jubilee again lor... den finally went see de doc, found out actually is to go the 'horse light' there, de 'ma guang'... den went see doc lor... de doc said the part i sprained is a part that is easily fractured, but luckily mine only sprain... den this doc said nth much very serious, den said can recover soon... den he directed me to another doc whom will 'massage' my hand lah... den in de process he said i need 2 go back again on wed or sat... so is need go back anot?? i oso dunno... de 1st doc said no need, this one said need... dunno lah... den this doc oso said i will feel pain in one or two days after that 'massage', and it is normal, and true enough, i'm feeling pain 2day... anyway, after the whole thing and was waiting for de medicine, saw edmund chen, that chen zhi cai, that mediacorp artiste lor... he went to take medicine only lah, not see doc or anything, but i oso dun quite care much lah... den after that oso nth much happened le... 2day oso nth much... tutorials and com only....

couple of days didn't update le, so 2day, with jay singing 'dao dai' in the background (from radio), i shall update a little abt this week... (btw, i tot 'dao dai' is jolin's song?? hmm...) wednesday, kang, qy and ben went pool, acy went his air rifle, gl went his soccer training, me got nothing on, so left sch quite early that day... wanted 2 go nj walk walk one, but ty got lessons till around 3, den got soccer training at 3.30 liao, so go there oso like a bit no point like that... oso, when i called him, he answered, when it was his lesson time, power sia... thursday, got afternoon pe... hmm.. correction, shld say got afternoon military training... but surprisingly, very surprisingly, alex lee let us off on time! u dun always see alex lee so nice one lor, mayb he got sth on, so rushing time... today.. sch ended earlier 2day, coz tml got aj family day (cum sth like funfair lah), so dismissed earlier to let us set up de stall... after sch, acy, qy, gl, kang and me went mac for lunch... actually they wanna go jp lah, but i dun wan lah, so went mac instead lor... paiseh ah, guys... i dunno y lah, but juz dun feel like goin jp lor... after lunch, acy and qy went back aj to help their class set up de stall, gl oso went back for his soccer, den me and kang went nj! crasher! ok lah, can say aj's security very slack one lor, nj there got security guards at side and main gates, so they will check one lor... den as me and kang were entering, den security guard asked if we were njcians, and demanded for our nj collar pins... so haf 2 wriggle our ways through lor... said i went back sch 2 take my shoe-bag, which i left in sch, and my collar pin inside, den he let us in... saw a couple of andersonians, den walked around de sch lor... bigger than aj lah, environment quite nice, atmosphere not bad, and sth 2 note is that de building dun look like it will collapse anytime, unlike aj =S den finally left when ty had 2 go for his soccer training at 4.30...

ok, next week looks likely 2 be the time when de o level results will be released... although no formal notification or wadever lah, but everyone seems 2 be saying is next week liao, so next week lor... to be frank lah, i dun really care abt it that much lor... not excited, worried, or wadever lah... i guess i'm those kind of ppl who live one day by one day one lor, dun really tink much abt future, only tink abt that day... to say excited, i'm more excited at next week's champions league game between chelsea and barcelona lor....

quite easily frustrated nowadays, and oso very sian too... very sian of studying le... everyday study study and study like mad lor... de pace is so fast lor... initially still ok, now like struggling le... easily frustrated oso, coz most tutorials i cannot finish liao... de quality and quantity are increasing rapidly.. more and harder... most tutorials i cannot do like half de paper lor... very frustrated one ah!!! computing and f maths very bad for me... computing most qns i cannot really do... partly becoz i dun haf logic =/ a lot thinking power needed lor, and i seem 2 lack that... f maths oso... often remember wad tan teck poh always says... 'dun be like a monkey... a monkey can remember how 2 do sth, but it will not understand y it is doing it...' ever since he started talking abt that, i have been thinking if i m one of the monkeys he was referring to... o level is not really a gauge lor, i dunno i know how 2 do qns becoz i memorized the examples and the steps or izit becoz i really know de concept and applying it... f maths definitely requires a lot of brain power, and currently i'm struggling wif f maths... so m i that monkey??

oh ya, oso, my left wrist, which i injured like 3 or 4 weeks ago, is getting worse and worse liao... haven't go see doc, haf 2 see one soon le, i dun wan it 2 get to the stage where it's too late 2 treat le... i still need my left hand one...

14 feb... valentine day... for those who are couples, 2day is valentine day lor, for the others, 2day is free food day... okok, like wad gl said, the stuff given are not staple food, so cannot say free food day... so 2day is free treats day? a lot of stuff lah... sweets ah, kit-kat ah, cookies ah, u name it, we got it... (mostly lah, not everything in de world) computing test was... hmmm, disaster? tink most likely that paper cmi liao, sure fail one... dunno one really dunno how do, tink mayb know how 2 do one all crap, so... let's not talk abt it anymore... sch ended at 3 today, den physics test would start only at 4.45, so stoned in classroom for 1 and a half hrs... so sian.... den finally go physics test... fairly ok lah, juz that i got a misconception abt a concept, so tink is 3 to 4 marks gone liao... anyway, after de test, supposed to go to some physics challenge one, where de representatives from each class will 'showcase' their parachutes... but so late liao, oso sian and tired liao, so skipped lor, since they said 'registration is from 5.45 to 6, registration after 6 will not be entertained', so we dun wan them 2 entertain us lor, so we went off lor... stupid sia, shld go eat 1st b4 going home... mother yesterday said 2day her boss treating her go 'lao yu sheng' (direct translation: old fish born??) anyway, went home, den bathed, den went out again to eat lor... wanted fast speed lah, so went mac lor, one double cheeseburger and one small coke, simple and easy... den now back home liao lor, got maths qn need do, tink tml morning go sch den do ba...

yesterday went back sch to watch de friendly game between aj and nj... de game was played in thirds, instead of halves... game ended wif score 3-0, aj won... gl got his first goal for aj (i tink)... both sides got their chances, juz that nj sort of lacked the luck 2 finish, hence quite a few chances wasted... nizar's place in de team was shown in de game... de team played better compared 2 the previous game against nyjc, when nizar didn't play... anyway, after de game, went to compass point to eat, wif kang and ty... after that went ty's hse... went thru a couple of maths stuff there, den played ps oso, den time passed like that lor... recently weather so hot, den at home oso nth 2 do, started a couple of days ago 2 continue playing this ps game 'legend of legaia' lor... stopped playing when sch started, but now use com oso nth 2 do, so now is play ps more liao lor... nowadays use com oso at most 2 times each day, each time at most 1 hr plus lor... tml got computing and physics tests... dunno wanna study anything abt computing anot... den physics read thru de lecture notes lor, at most 2 times ba... still got homework haven't do, but dun feel like doing... haizzz, later den see how ba...

past 2 days nth really much 2 do lah... each day go out once 2 bai nian ('pray year') lor... oso very sian at home lah, nth 2 do... so it's how u see it lor... stay home rot, or go sch got sth do but will end up very tired each day... i even took out my ps 2 play lor... i usually only touch my ps during sch holidays, but past 2 days were pure boredom... today got sch... i got go, but kang n gl didnt.. quite 'outstanding' lor, coz it's like since we started as a class in 08/05, de 3 andersonians will go everywhere 2gether one lor, if dun haf all 3 at least got 2... but 2day only got one andersonian in de class, which is me lah, so quite an uncommon sight... during physics, as wad de class said abt de festive season and wadever, christopher den agreed 2 juz discuss 2 tutorial qns b4 we started to chit chat.. btw, christopher is our tutor, relief one, he's still studying in australia, that new south wales sch lor, de one related 2 de new south wales test thingy one... anyway, den he started talking abt psychology, coz he got study it oso mah... den a lot of complex theorems lor... like wad a male or female, if close 2 his/her parent of de opposite sex, in de future, sub-consciously will look for partners who have characters similar to that parent lor... den me asked wad if a boy close 2 his father? den wad he explained i oso dunno lah... but after his brief talk abt psychology, i quite interested in it... mayb next time got go library can go look for related books... not that i wanna analyse ppl i noe, but it's more of i wanna analyse myself... 2 be frank, after almost 17 yrs being myself, i still dun quite understand myself lah, so shld be time 2 understand me le... like wad ppl always say 'to understand others u muz 1st understand urself' so i guess psychology may be a way 2 find out abt myself... den after physics is CLAO, which is break 4 me... one and a half hr break, went 2 eat, den went library read soccer magazine lor... den is 2 periods maths tutorials... need do summation tutorial, me nvr do, so as ms bok (our tutor) talked, i did a couple of qns in meantime lor... oh great, tired liao, wanna sleep le, let's speed up... summarize le, rest of sch day nth much, civics and project work... den went home lor... at home oso sian, played 1 hr plus of ps, go online oso nth do, only go utopia n friendster read read other ppl's profiles and testimonials lor... oso my hse recently infested wif mosquitoes, tons of them around, these few nites at least will wake up one time due 2 itchy arms and legs... =/ anyway, tml got go back sch, tink got friendly game btwn aj and nj... shld be a good game i guess....

2day aj's celebrations ended quite early... ended at 9 plus, den went back to anderson sec... however, although we walked from aj to andss, aj and andss are so near, so we reached andss very early... nth much 2 do over there, went to hall to see de concert, but it was juz starting, den oso not many ex-andersonians there, so really nth much 2 do... den me, gl, qy and acy walked around aimlessly lor... we were juz waiting for kang and ben to reach de sch... den kang arrived, and later ben den reached... den we went amk mac to eat lunch, den went play pool... many ppl, so we haf 2 wait for free tables... soon, ty oso arrived le... den played for around 2 hrs like that... den went home liao...

new year eve.... so sian, so tired... nth much 2 do anyway... juz now watched that movie starring andy lau and so on, that movie abt mahjong... that movie quite lame actually... besides that movie i believe 2day at home was juz made up of the routine reunion steamboat, and computer, that's all...

sometimes do u find that u may haf made a wrong decision, or chose a wrong path in the past, and thus causing limitations now for u... u r bounded by the restrictions of the after-effects of that choice u made, and hence u juz haf 2 stick to it, and find it damn difficult, or can say impossible, to do another thing.... i guess no matter it is in a small group, or in a big organisation, an individual's voice is negligible one... in this world, most stuff are depended on majority... majority wins, rite? so an individual's disagreement, or a different decision wanted by an individual is juz minority, and minority loses... but to tink abt it again, there are too many 'wad if's in this world liao... like me i already got tons of regrets and often tink of 'wad if blah blah blah....' so to talk abt this kind of stuff doesn't quite make much point i guess...

learn 2 shut up... is it good or bad?? talk a lot = irritating, being extra, expressing thoughts, or.....?? shut up = not annoying, suppressing thoughts, better for the others around u, suffering w/o saying it out, or....??

yesterday went zhihao's hse... gl, qy, kang and ben went early in the morning le, while i woke up only at 11.30am =/ was tinking whether 2 go, coz i dunno how go his hse, when ty sms me... den i found out that he oso wanna go, after his morning training... so went compass, had lunch wif him, den went 2 zh's hse lor... den played winning 11 at his hse lor... den de rest went play their mahjong... wang leehom's new album not bad sia... i long time oso nvr buy cd le, can consider... anyway, at 7 plus, ty went home 1st coz he need go home eat... meanwhile, i used zh's com, and still listened to wang leehom's album, for the 5th or 6th time? listened over and over again till i forget liao... den after they finished their game went mac eat dinner... i'm now officially de slowest eater in antarctica... even ty oso win me liao =/ anyway, to today... damn tired 2day, dunno y last nite can't slp even though it was 11 plus le... den toss here toss there, until dunno wad time den fell asleep... den 2day so tired lor... fell asleep b4 physics lesson, den christopher liu come in de class oso nvr call me wake up =/ den it's like i was sitting there sleeping, while de others were standing up, and christopher liu planning 2 throw his marker at me liao... anyway, got maths test 2day... when it was tot that only got FM A, den suddenly got the FM B 'surprise test'... nth much we can do abt it, so we juz continue 2 do lor... tink i did fairly ok ba... dun wanna tink abt tests liao, CNY time!!! to all reading this, no matter whether it's chinese new year le, or not yet, or even it's past le, i still wish u a HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR!!! hope u can haf a great year ahead... aiyo, typed so much, hand aching liao... sprained my hand abt 3 weeks lor, haven't go treat it yet, now can feel that it's worsening pretty fast.. sometimes even doing nth den wrist oso can auto ache one... wah sian... hope it can recover soon...

ok, couple of days didnt blog le... update a bit now, compress wad happened during these few days into one entry... tuesday... erm... hmmm.... oso forgot wad happened on tues le, so let's carry on to wed... wednesday, shortest day of the week, supposed 2 go to photographic society outing one, but coz physics need do some parachute thingy, so pon de outing... haizzz, sian liao lor, pon de outing, den i tink next PS meeting oso no need go le... coz next meeting is to learn how 2 develop de pictures taken during this week's outing... so since i dun haf any photo 2 develop, den i go for wad??? hopefully there's no 'black-list' or something like that in PS, if not den i mayb tio liao... i still wanna join PS one!! anyway, back to the parachute thingy, kang went back anderson sec 2 borrow de extra big sized compass, so we can outline a circle of radius 40cm.. (hmm.. is it 40 cm?? i oso forgot le... somewhere around there lah) den we tried it out a couple of times at kang's hse lor... anyhow fly one, can't really control direction... den thurs... during physics prac is to try out every grp's parachute and pick one 2 represent class lor... den need grp name, so we chose 'antarctica'... wad other better name? anyway, finally our parachute was selected 2 represent class, but i oso dunno y we got selected... mostly luck i guess... den thurs didn't go recre soccer, tired ah, wan go home rest... den friday... got aj friendly against nyjc.. tinyau and ben came 2 watch too... den game ended wif score of 2-1, aj won, but aj's 2 goals are weird (freak) goals... the goals are both from freekicks, and both are scored directly... both seemed 2 be intended to be crosses, but no one touched at all, so it juz bounced or floated into the net lor... anyway, after watching de game, went 2 amk central wif kang, ben and tinyau for dinner lor... den saw cheekian there, and he joined our table... finally, today.... went to chinese high (or hcjc lah, wadever lah... i oso dunno whether they are both together or separated buildings... i juz noe they are now in one thing called hwa chong institute, i tink... ) went there to play a soccer game wif jinyang's boss's team... they are like 30-plus ppl, but in de end we lost 3-0... found de game quite tough, coz they got a lot of strength lor, can muscle their ways thru the defence or to get the loose ball... ok, this is about it for de summary for these few days... chinese new year coming!! can haf break liao... but didn't go buy new clothes, only bought one shirt, which i now find the colours not really that nice... see ba, no new clothes den wear back old ones lor, oso won't make much of difference, clothes only mah... haizzz, b4 CNY still got maths test... sian lor, this coming monday, and oso 1 and a half hr test.... dunno wan 2 study much for it anot... binomial and differentiation... see 1st ba....